Missing
by capitol grasshopper
Summary: "I hate you," she whispers. "I hate you more," he replies, lips brushing at her hairline. Drabble series.
1. Missing

**A/N: Welcome, welcome! First drabble series I ever wrote and it's about Hayffie, go figure!**

**Beware I'm not a native speaker. I'm also OCDing a lot about round numbers so drabbles in this series are 100/50 wrods each, pre series up to Mockingjay (AU). Enjoy.  
**

* * *

_Prequel_

**Kindergarten**

He teases her about her outfit, her hair, her snob capitol accent, he teases her, year after year. But she never breaks, she drives him nuts with her composure and her lack of reaction, her quiet indignation. He smirks whenever she flinches, whenever she purses her lips, whenever she narrows her beautiful eyes at him. He relishes the handful of times he can actually embarrass her, make her flush underneath all that make up, feel her quiet fury on his skin when she slaps his cheek… But that too is numbed by the booze and he's always left wanting more.

**Nightmares**

He wakes up in the middle of the night and reaches for the knife under his pillow when he feels someone in his bed next to him. The blade stops only inches from her creamy skin and he meets her terrified eyes.

"What are you doing in here?" he yells at her, falling out of his nightmares as he watches her gathering her clothes and quickly rounding the bed. "Wait, princess," he calls trying to catch up with reality, "what happened?"

But she's already out the door and he's still holding the knife, his own blood running down his arm.

**Talk**

"I hate you," she barks back, yanking her wrist from his grip.

"I hate you more, sweetheart, I'm sorry I fucked up, I-"

"Save it," she cuts him "try not to fuck up the lives of your tributes instead, just for once, Haymitch."

He can only watch her leave again.

* * *

_Third Quarter Quell_

**Forgiveness**

After Peeta and Katniss, there she comes, knocking at his door with a request. He thinks he's too sober to understand why she's crying then remembers she'll be the one drawing their names the next morning. She kisses his lips, he dries her eyes and forgets alcohol for the rest of the night.

He watches her sleep in the early morning light, head resting on his arm, legs entwined with his. He combs his fingers through her blonde locks. "Chin up, smile on, it's a big, big, big day, sweetheart, don't be late," he whispers, lips brushing at her hairline.

* * *

_Rebellion_

**Gone**

He arranged for her to be picked up with the prep team the night Katniss blew the arena. But she never made it to 13. No one knows anything about the escort, no one tried to find her, no one cared anyway.

Haymitch walks past the guard on level 39 clutching his throbbing hand. A pain he forgets as he spots her bony figure chained to the wall, barely dressed in a hospital gown.

"I'm sorry, Princess, I'm late," he mutters as he helps her stand.

She has no answer, her eyes are two big black holes showing no recognition.

**Rehab**

Nothing will ever be the same. Effie makes sure he wears clean clothes everyday, eats properly, bathes regularly; she keeps his room tidy and, surprising as it might, makes the lack of alcohol almost bearable. He fought the two soldiers Coin sent to retrieve her that same day and got Plutarch to help him assigning her to his care, free of drugs, after a week of negotiations. His _care_ consists of the only thing that soothes her withdrawal: "I hate you." she cries as he holds her tighter. "I hate you more, sweetheart," he answers, lips brushing at her hairline.

**Gold**

He wears the bangle like a shackle since Finnick returned it, twisting it, rolling it on his wrist, making it clash with other surfaces, bruising it, dirtying it, scarring it. When it looks worn out he's used to it.

He polishes the surface and thinks about getting her a ring.

**Truth**

They fight and he loses. She leaves in a cloud of feathers and golden locks, he crashes on the tangled sheets of their bed in Snow's mansion, cursing her name and pretending the booze will cure it all. They were never meant to be anyway.

He drinks himself to stupor.

**Rewind**

She climbs in bed next to him, shifts his hair off his face, whispers something he doesn't understand and peppers his bare back with feather light kisses. He just lies there, unable to tell wishes from reality in his drunken state. "You hate me, sweetheart," he slurs.

"You hate me more," she states.

He trades his fingers through golden locks and feathers, makes his way to her heart and rests his cheek there. Her arms are still wrapped around him in the morning light. It's a big, big, big day, she shouldn't be late, but he only holds her tighter.

* * *

_Epilogue_

**Endings**

Katniss wins the games. Katniss blows the arena. Katniss kills Coin. Katniss lives next door with Peeta.

Haymitch throws breadcrumbs to the geese enjoying the sunset through a alcohol induced haze. He's not the hero of this story and he did not get the girl. She lives in the capitol, wears golden hair and purses her lips at him in his dreams. He thinks he's dreaming when he catches a whiff of her perfume, thinks it's his mind playing tricks on him when he feels her hands around him, a golden ring at her finger.

He smiles. She's back home.


	2. AU

**A/N: not as off as book canon since Effie will be in 13 in the movies but here's an AU, assuming canon is as presented in chapter 1**

* * *

_Mockingjay_

**AU Rescue**

She hears his voice and calls his name when they come for Peeta. She believes the surprise in his eyes when he takes in her chopped nails, bloodshot eyes and cracked lips.

The journey to 13 is long and mostly silent. He combs his fingers through her short irregular strands. "I like your new hair style," he says.

Her eyes watery, she mechanically repeats: "It'll grow longer."

He doesn't give a damn about the lenght of her hair, he contents himself holding her tighter.

"I hate you," she whispers.

"I hate you more," he replies, lips brushing at her hairline.

**AU Detention**

As it turns out, Effie trades one cell for another, being charged with war crimes by the government in 13. It takes eleven days and Plutarch's help for Haymitch to be allowed a visit.

"I'm sorry for that," he says.

"It's better than before," she replies flatly.

He naively thought ignorance would have kept her safe. Life never prepared her for the starvation and torture she went through for information she never had.

"Don't get too comfy in here," he adds shifting his weight from one foot to another "I'm working on it."

"Thank you," she whispers while he leaves.

**AU Pink 1**

"What's that?" asks Katniss.

He frowns, shifts his eyes on the pink cloth wrapped around his arm annoyed. "A gift."

"For whom? A girl?" she teases.

Instead of answering he gulps down the remains of his meal and stands.

"She loves gold!" yells Katniss after him.

But pink will do.

**AU Pink 2**

When Finnick doesn't come back he makes a beeline to where a woman in a pink clad head is hanging clean sheets out to dry.

She lets him hold her for long before she wraps her arms around him as well, easing his trembling, whispering soothing words at his ear.

**AU Unchanged**

She blames him for the scars she wears, for the haunting nightmares that will never really leave her, for the death sentence hanging on her head, and now for allowing new Hunger Games.

Yet she stands at his left, chin up, smile on, and a vacant look in her eyes.


End file.
